|
Latest Industry Articles & News:
|
|
 |
| |
|
|
Published : November 24, 2008 |
Author : Guru-reza
Category : Parenting | Total Views
: 1044 | Rating :  
|
|
|
Everybody gets good feelings when things go her way. Only the masters get good feelings when bad things happen because they know that they will learn a great lesson from that experience.
The children exhibit their feelings in their emotional states. As they have criteria within themselves for how to perceive different things, they also have their own way of measuring different feelings and show them in their hierarchy of feelings. The hierarchy of the feelings is measured by the intensity of the feelings. The intensity of the feeling is exhibited in the voices and physical movements and non-verbal gestures. The hierarchy of feelings is demonstrated more when the children do not like something. It is pain and what generates pain that children unconsciously and naturally exhibit in their behaviours and try to avoid them.
When they manifest the disapproval of an action and scream and cry, you can measure the level of pain that they go through even if when they refuse to do something which is very important to their being. While the children need care, they also want to be free in choosing what they want. They choose according to their emotions and feelings. Their emotions and feelings lead them to the selection of the behaviour they want.
When they showed more interest in something, it means that they have more intensity of emotions about that. Their emotions are generated by the things and reactions to the actions that they demonstrate in dealing with other people. The intensity of the feelings manifests how much they can care for some thing. Some researchers have proved that the children do not care about other children as much as the adults do. In fact they do not identify with other children as much as the adult do. They go through their period of self-centredness that moves away their attention from everybody else.
While they get impressed by the behaviours of others, the children wish to feel good even when other children suffered because of them. It seems that the children do not feel appropriately the sufferings of other children. They are more attentive to their own feelings and oblivious of how other people and children feel. Some people interpret this state of affairs as if the children do not feel mercy. They do feel mercy but they think that when they fight or when they compete for some thing, each of them thinks more of himself and therefore, becomes less aware of this state of the pain that is experienced by the other side.
A coaching parent, a coaching teacher and a coaching trainer must be able to measure different feelings that children feel the in different circumstances. It must be noticed that every state creates its own feelings. Each state relates to one event and one particular thing. The important thing is how to interpret the feelings into numbers. While the negative feelings of pain are demonstrated more objectively than the happy feelings of good states, yet it is difficult to accurately measure both negative and positive feelings. It is very important to understand severe negative feelings the child exhibits about something, a subject, and idea, a job, a person, or any other issue. The purpose of the child must not be related to those issues that generate enormous pain. From the negative feelings, the coach of child must draw very clear lessons. What causes the pain can give the children very good lessons but cannot motivate the child to take the subject as a future purpose.
One way to benefit from necessary actions which may involve some pain and hardships is the useful lessons that they can offer. What people learn from their painful experiences, they usually do not learn from easy and desirable experiences. Tough experiences therefore have their own benefits but people try to avoid them anyway. The lessons that can be learnt from rough roads, steep path and painful experiences will last more and will appear more operational in life.
Lets make travelling on rough roads and painful experiences some training courses for learning to be tougher and more equipped for dangerous times that may come on our way when we least expect them. Good feelings become more meaningful after painful experiences.
Reza Hossein Borr is an NLP Master Trainer and a leadership consultant and the creator of 150 CDs and 14 Change management models. He is also the author of Manual Success, Manual of Coaching and Mentoring, Motivational Stories that Can Change Your Life, and a New Vision for the Islamic World. He can be contacted by email: sarawani@aol.com |
|
|
 Visitor's Comments ! |
|
|
|
| Parenting Best Seller |
» Coaching
Children | Your children are your products.
Inspire your children forever.
 |
| Free Personal Coaching |
» Personal Coaching Online | Improve your skills on a range of subjects online. It's easy & FREE!
 |
| Free Executive Coaching |
» Executive Coaching Online | Become a peak performer. Stand out with executive coaching. Sign up FREE!
 |
|
Random Pick |
What do honesty and prosperity, or our success, have to do with each other? Everything! |
|
|
|
Statistics |
| » Total Articles |
44
|
| » Total Authors |
67
|
| » Total Views |
24382
|
| » Total categories |
39
|
|
